New Years Eve Two Years Ago...

>> Tuesday, December 29, 2009

A couple of years ago, I went to a house party for New Years Eve. A bunch of couples and a few singles. I was one of those singles and there was only one other single that I could tolerate for an evening. The problem with this is that I found out before that night just a little too much information about STDDee's extra curricular activities. STDDee was a slut. It was actually known throughout the group. Girl likes to play. Cute girl don't get me wrong, but most likely (never confirmed) up to her eyeballs with transmitted issues. Possibly. I don't think I could ever be drunk there is a big chance if I ever were drunk enough, it would be like throwing a pencil down a hallway. Anyway, not the point. I know going into the party that I'm not going to do anything with her and I was fine with that. Here's a bonus : she brought a friend that she picked up at a bar the night before. Stranger danger never looked so good. It got me out of an eventual decline of STDDee's drunk advances. It was known that STDDee liked me and wants me like they did in the bible times.

After a few hours of drinking and the lame midnight couples kissing event, I found my way to the couch. I was buzzed. Feeling good. Not drunk, but just enough to know where I was but everything was just a little slo-mo. I see STDDee walking towards me...straddles me....and puts a big fat kiss on me. Now remember, she is cute. A little cleaner and it would have been one fun night. I'm buzzed enough to allow the kiss but not drunk enough to open my mouth. Her date is in the other room. After the kiss she gets up all drunk sexy like, taking her hands from my neck and rubbing them down my chest ending with the touching of the junk. Also remember, drunk touching is not sexy touching... but she tried. I smiled. She leaves to the other room. I stayed put. Moving on...

The plan for the night was that I would stay the night (because of the drinking) and would take one of the spare bedrooms. That was true until STDDee showed up with Stranger Date. They took the room and I got the couch. Fuck. About an hour later I am hearing noises from the spare bedroom they are in. The bathroom is next door to the room. I have to pee. I get up to go and when I get to the door, STDDee is praying like she is dying. Now, once you hear a couple fucking... you can hear them until they stop. They never stopped. Sure they stopped each time after Stranger Date unloaded, but would get right back at it. Praying and I think some slapping. I had to turn on the TV so I could drown out all the "fuck me's". All I could do was turn on the TV. I had 4 remotes and none of them seemed to be equipped to change the fucking channel. I got stuck having to watch Stomp The Yard.

Here's the funny part : As morning came and everyone (about 7 of us) was up and talking in the living room, STDDee and Stranger Date got up and left abruptly. Then a few minutes later, she comes back and asks the host if she could go with her to the room...something about the guy losing his wallet.

He didn't lose his wallet.

During their romantic love making sessions, instead of shooting inside her, on her or in her mouth, Stranger Date grabs one of the good hand towels in the bathroom and shoots in it. STDDee needed help finding that so she could take it, wash it and return it. Host told her that she could keep it and that she didn't need one nice hand towel with a few rough spots.

So to recap the New Years Eve party of a few years ago : I got kissed by STDDee who had sex with a stranger who jizzed into nice hand towels and left...only to come back for the hand towel in shame.

And I had to watch Stomp The Yard.


otherworldlyone December 30, 2009 at 4:47 AM  

Haha. STDDee might be one of the best (and worst) nicknames ever.

Thank gawd you have some sense. I hope your host had some as well and burned those damn sheets. Next gift giving holiday/birthday you should give her some new hand towels.

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